Sunday, July 29, 2012

Re-birth or Re-incarnation....!!

या मेरे मौला,
या मेरे रहीम-ओ-करीम,
सल्ललाहो अलिही वसल्लम...,

तेरी शान में एक और गुस्ताखी कर रहा हूँ मैं
तेरे मर्तबे से एक और गद्दारी कर रहा हूँ मैं

इन दुखी-बीमार लोगों के जहाँ से होकर के परेशान
तेरी जान तुझे वापस करने की हिमाक़त कर रहा हूँ मैं

हाँ मेरे हुजुर-ए-पाक शाह...
एक बार फिर ये रिश्ता तोड़ रहा हूँ मैं
हाँ मेरे ख्वाजा गरीब नवाज...
एक बार और ये गुनाह कर रहा हूँ मैं

कसम खाता हूँ की मैं भी इन जैसा दुखी और बीमार हो जाऊँगा
तेरी काएनात को एक बार और दोजख में बदलने की तैय्यारी कर रहा हूँ मैं

कोई मतलब ना रखूँगा मैं अब किसी से भी कोई
बेमतलब तेरे जहानी रुतबे को खामखाँ मतलबी कर रहा हूँ मैं

बदल डालूँगा मैं खुद को या खुदाया तेरी इस खुदाई में
तेरी दी हुई इस रूह को आज जिबह कर रहा हूँ मैं

बक्श दे मुझे भी इश्क और ईमान की गुलामी से तू
तेरी दी हुई आज़ादी से आज तौबा करना चाहता हूँ मैं

चीड़ होने लगी है मुझे अब मेरे होने से
तेरे वजूद को आज खुद से खारिज कर रहा हूँ मैं

तरस खा ले तू आज मुझ दीवाने वारसी पर ए मेरे मौला
देख ये क्या गज़ब कर रहा हूँ मैं...

This ghazal or call it whatever you like, came out of me just before my 43rd birthday on 27th March.
Next day, that is on 28th March 2012 my head went through a fatal accident in a Shiv temple in Ujjain.
That temple has come alive into picture because of the junoon of my kaamil murshid ( Satguru) who 27 years before now was a gangster, a don, a famous student leader called Pappu Vidhyarthi.
The don lost his younger spiritual brother when he was brutally murdered by a group of 8 people who were enemies of the don.
The don was in jail at that time.
When the don came out of jail people thought that the don will definately take revenge from those 8 people but something godly has happened in the jail which completely transformed the don.
Since last 27 years the don has continued to seek forgiveness from Almighty and he does it every minute of his life even now when the lord has indeed firgiven him for his crimes and transformed him into a saint, a fakir, a baba now.
His Satguru gave him anew name called Pandit Bedaar Shah Waarsi which very few people of Ujjain are aware about as they are still stuck with his past life.
For such people of the town he is still Pappu Vidhyaarthi - a goonda, a murderer, a don.
He kept me in his lap for 9 hours that night when my head brutally fell on a concrete ground and prayed and kept on begging Almighty for survival of a body which indeed was full of an egoistic and angry mind but also had a soulful spirit full of love and innocent heart.
My head went through one and half hours of neurosurgery at Gokuldas hospital in Indore on 29th March, 2012.
By His grace my spirit is still alive and doing well to heal me from the sadness and sickness of my egoistic and angry mind.


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